the state of things

 

A Matter Of Time

by Douglas Lindsay - 04:24 on 04 October 2008
Got sucked into shopping last night. It happens sometimes, doesn't it? You're out with your wife, and before you go for dinner, you accept that there are a couple of things you need to buy. You're a man, you think, we'll go into a shop and we'll buy what we need. However, you've forgotten one fundamental fact about your wife.

She's a woman. Women are incapable of going into a shop and just plain buying what it is they came out for. They need to go and check every other shop in the mall, even the ones that obviously don't contain what it is you're looking for.

Anyway, I shan't go on. We all know this. Everyone from Aristotle to Nietzsche and from Boris Johnson to Bill and Ben The Flowerpot Men, have written on the subject of the basic differences between men and women when out shopping. No, the interesting thing about last night's shopping fiasco was that we were in a jewellers and there was a watch for sale in there which cost 68850PLN. By today's exchange rate that is equivalent to £16,747.75. For a watch. All it appeared to do was tell the time.

Watches which cost £16,747.75 are like midgies on the west coast of Scotland in summer. You know they exist, but it's not until you experience them in the flesh that you think, Holy Crap!

It was just sitting there in the shop, for all the world like it was a normal thing. A watch which costs £16,747.75. It had its own case, sure enough, and it was a limited edition watch - although to be honest that just puts it on a par with beer-flavoured crisps and Mars Midnight - but when all was said and done and the fat lady had sung...it was just a dumb-assed watch.

Manufactured by Maurice Lacroix himself. He lives in Switzerland apparently. I presume Maurice is a thing, but I've never heard of him and I'm not even going to look him up on Wikipedia. Wonder if his name is pronounced Morris or Maw-reece. I think someone who produces a watch which costs more than a car should be called Maw-reece.

So, the rest of the story is obvious. I bought the watch. Brought it home, and one of the kids broke it.

Isn't that always the way? The exact same thing happened with our Ferrari.

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