the state of things



by Elvis Shackleton - 09:26 on 21 June 2010

It's like rai-ay-ain on your wedding day

It's a free ride when you've already paid

It's the good advice that you just couldn't take*

It's like Kaka being sent off

Because Kader Keita

With the honesty of J Edgar Hoover

Went down using football's famous 

Face Clutching Manoeuvre

After the Brazilians for eighty-five minutes

Had rolled around

Like wildebeest on the ground

Brought down by lions

Attempting to induce red cards

And Keita will have learned

The art of Face Clutching

From Square-Jawed, overpaid Brazilian uber-legend


Yet in the end

The referee decided to send

A Brazilian to wend

His way slowly to the showers.

Isn't it ironic?

* The first three lines are not actually ironic, apart from in North America where the Normal Rules of Irony do not apply

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