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Scenes From The Barbershop Floor

Experts are divided on whether or not the online scripted sitcom is a thing, but whether or not it is, Scenes From The Barbershop Floor is one of them. Described by the publisher's highly paid marketing executives as Seinfeld meets Edward Scissorhands, SFTBF is basically an ongoing Barney Thomson narrative, with no narrative. No murders, no drama, no storyline, just the men of the Millport barbershop going about the business of cutting hair, chatting amongst themselves, and looking out upon the world while drinking endless cups of tea.

The first series of ten episodes is available in this handy book-sized volume, as both an ebook and paperback. Series 2 is currently taking place online, and can be found here.

And now, the afternoon was swirling by, a muddle of seconds and minutes, jumbled one on top of the other. The men of the shop were standing at the window, looking out on the world, a cup of tea each in hand. The world outside the window was quiet, although it was, as the Band Aid fellows would point out, a world of dread and fear. The virus was spreading, faster now than in the dark days of the spring, and few were there amongst the people who would be able to avoid its rasping, grasping touch.

‘What d’you make of the brazen bull?’ Keanu threw into the mix out of nowhere, ending a near fifteen-minute silence, when the men had drunk the kind of neverending cups of tea that usually only exist in fiction.

Igor shuddered. Barney looked concerned – he didn’t like it when Igor shuddered – and then gave Keanu the eyebrow of curiosity.

‘Go on.’

‘You ain’t ever heard of the brazen bull?’

‘Nope. Is it a pub in Largs?’

‘It’s not a pub.’

‘Is it a bull with an unusually high level of confidence, even for a bull?’”

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